Akubras and Accomplishments

[WARNING: I’ve included a few graphic birth photos here. If this might bother you, just don’t read it. They aren’t human. ]

war brides

My mother and father met in Newcastle, New South Wales, Australia at a servicemen’s club.  Mom was a local volunteer. Dad was an American GI. It’s a relatively familiar World War II story. [Note: my mother is not in the photo, but she sure could have been.]

In 1987, my mother went home for the first time since 1946, and I went with her. We stayed three weeks and I got to meet all my Aussie relatives.

While we were there, I bought some souvenirs for Dave and Nathan waiting at home in America.

Among those were three Akubra hats, one for each of us. Here’s one of them.

akubra on stand

inside hat

And there’s the inside of the hat.  Notice the size tag?  It’s upside down (I had to either have the name of the hat right side up or the size).  It’s also metric. In American-speak, that would be an extra-large.

This is Dave’s hat. Nathan’s is very similar and it’s the same size.  Mine is much smaller.

That’s because Nathan and Dave both have/had large heads.  When I bought those hats, I had to sort of guess about Nathan’s hat size. I knew Dave would take something fairly large, but I wasn’t sure about Nate, and in 1987, calling America from Australia to ask about a head measurement was a ridiculous idea, so I guessed.

I guessed that because I had to have a C-section when he was born due to the fact that his head simply would not fit through my pelvic opening (it was simple math – and I know, math is hard – but it was pretty simple), his hat size might be very similar to his dad’s.  I could not have strained harder or worked longer or made up my mind to fit Nathan through my pelvic opening. He wouldn’t fit. The circumference of his head (even if it smushed down a bit as vaginally-born babies’ heads do) was greater than the circumference of the opening.

So I guess that he might need a large hat.

I guessed right.

So, what does this have to do with anything?

Glad you asked.

it is an accomplishment

Nicole is all peeved, it seems, because the post about Dr. Tuteur wasn’t about her.  It’s sort of amazing, really. She insists that I should just write about somebody else or something else, so I did. I thought that would make her happy.

It didn’t, as you can see.

And no, Nicole, nobody thought you should be offended. Nobody gives a damn whether you are offended or not.

But this is just so interesting.

It seems that either Dr. Tuteur or I (I’m not sure who she is insulting here, and don’t care) “can’t handle the biological aspect of motherhood.”  Can’t handle it.  What does that even mean? Dr. Tuteur has four children, so I suspect that she did just fine “handling” it.  I had one, and couldn’t have any more, so I’m an abject failure, I guess.

Nicole believes that conception and birth and breastfeeding are somehow gauges of the worth of a female human being.  Can’t do it?  You’re a failure. Don’t wanna do it?  You’re a bigger failure. Do it a whole lot?  You’re a super success.  Do it without any help?  You’re a bigger success.

Nicole thinks that having 11 children via “natural childbirth” and breastfeeding them is an accomplishment. I was so delighted to find this out that I jumped right up and ran out to the pasture to tell Frances.

frances looking

“Frances!” I yelled. “You are accomplished.”

She gave me that look.  You know, like above.  The what-in-the-hell-are-you-talking-about look.

“Nicole says you are accomplished,” I said. “You’ve had lots of calves. You give lots of milk. You’re accomplished, Frances.”

You see, Frances has had five calves since she came to live with us in 2011, and she had one little bull calf before we met her.  And we think she’s bred again (hopefully).  She pretty much has a calf every year.

She has had actual sex with an actual bull exactly twice.  Both times a one-night stand, which is all cows ever have, since they are only in heat for about 12 hours at a time.

She was with a bull for her first breeding at the dairy. They do this on purpose. The bull is better at breeding those heifers than the farmer is with artificial insemination, and they generally keep a small bull hoping that he will father a small calf and thus make her first calf easier to deliver.

And we think one of our bull calves got her bred a few weeks ago. That was a total accident. None of us thought that calf was old enough to do the deed, but I think he managed to surprise us. It was obvious that they’d had a fine time during the night when we went out the next morning. [It’s okay if she is. We know who did the deed, and he’s nicely purebred and registered and not related to her, but still, it was unplanned.]

Anyway, that’s it.  Every other time, she’s been bred via AI.  No bull, just a farmer and a long straw thing.

Little sperm meet an egg and bam!  you’ve got a baby.

And then, just like in people, about nine months later (283 days to be exact about it, give or take a few), you get this.

feet showing

Those are feet. Front feet. Tops up, bottoms down. The white part is the hoof.  Exactly perfect.

feet head

And a bit later, the head emerges (it’s on top, eyes closed, nose on top of one of the front legs).  Again, perfect position.

Frances with calf

A few minutes later, and a bunch of good pushes, and we have this.  Meet Claire.  Frances is doing her mother thing, but don’t let her fool you. This will last for about 2 hours and then she’s done.

She’s all finished with that part of her “accomplishment.”  She scratches it off the list and turns the new baby over to the nursery staff (me and Dave) and heads for the pasture and the older calves that she can boss around.

Now, how much urging did I have to do to get her to do this?  Answer?  None. How much effort did she have to initiate to get this process started?  Answer? None.  Do you suppose she could have stopped the process?  Answer?  No.

Oh, and she breastfeeds, of course.

Sort of.

Frances milking

Frances is a very modern gal and she prefers it like this, thank you very much.

She produces enough milk, not just for one calf, but for five at a time, plus a pig, plus all the milk Dave and I can drink, plus our butter, ice cream and cheese. Usually, she makes about six gallons of milk daily at her peak. This slowly decreases during a lactation period down to about three gallons a day. We then dry her off for two months and she calves again and it all repeats.

And she “accomplishes” all this with massive effort on her part.  Just massive.  See?

Frances grazing

There she is, working hard.

Frances grazing

And here.  The calves with her are the age she prefers. She is Boss Cow and that’s how she likes it.

She expends no effort at all to do all this. Other than those two nights of bull sex, she does absolutely nothing to have all those calves and make all that milk. She doesn’t cause it and she cannot stop it.  She would and has calved with nobody present at all, although we try not to have that happen.

In the photos I showed, I did nothing but take pictures. I didn’t help her in any way.  In a couple of calvings, we did intervene and pull the calf, but that was mostly because it was midnight and during an ice storm and we were all cold and tired and wanted to go to bed. She would have had him anyway if we’d just waited. [There is some evidence that once the head emerges, the sooner the calf is born the more likely you are to have a good outcome, so pulling them is not a bad idea.]

And obviously, nobody can help her make milk.  She can’t strive to make milk. She can’t keep from making milk. She just eats and sleeps and it happens.

We do not have to go out to the pasture and say, “Frances, you go girl. You just work at it and make that milk.”  Or “Frances, how is that calf coming along? Are you working hard at growing it?”  Or “Frances,  you have to work harder, hon. That calf is not going to grow himself.”

And after we milk, she gets neck scratches (probably her favorite thing in the world), but we don’t say, “Frances, thank you for trying so hard today and pushing that extra bit and making that extra pint.”

Nobody says to the dairyman, “How much milk did your cows accomplish today?”  Or “How many calves did your cows accomplish this year?”  Or “Is this cow really good at accomplishing stuff?”

Giving birth is not an accomplishment.  It’s a natural phenomenon that happens after a female mammal has sex and conceives. Making milk is not an accomplishment. It just happens all by itself.

This is an accomplishment.

carving wood

This is also an accomplishment.


Here’s somebody accomplishing something.

reading children

And here’s somebody else accomplishing something.

dog groomer

But being a brood cow?

Not so much.


45 thoughts on “Akubras and Accomplishments”

  1. She is the type of asshat who thinks women who can’t have a child vaginally didn’t “give birth “! I guess I’m Queen Bitch cause I’ve done both.

    Nope, its not this great accomplishment its what we our bodies are designed to do. Some of us just happen to be more fertile than others. Sadly like in the NagClan, some shouldn’t be so fertile. JMHO


  2. My great grandmother had 11 or 12 kids. I died when he was 12, I believe the first one died before 1 year of age. She began having kids in the late 1890’s. Nicole isn’t doing anything that hasnt been done before. She’s just lucky they haven’t lost any yet.


  3. Nicole 11-1. 11 kids lived and one died and was sadly buried on a rental property. I buried a dog I loved in our yard. I can’t imagine digging a hole and throwing one of my kids in though. I think that is normal for a good mother.

    How sad she opted not to mention number 12.


  4. 11 kids lived and one died and was sadly buried on a rental property.

    I have never seen proof of this. It’s a rumor, I grant you, but I’ve never seen any proof.


  5. But she has 12 kids. Their first born is Alex and she took on the role of Mom to him. Sadly, they threw him under the bus on social media because he dared to speak up about the abuse he endured by the hands of nicole and Joe. His parents who should have protected him. To top it off, Joe refused to pay child support that he still owes and to this day refuses to work to avoid deductions from his pay. He would rather plunges the 11 other kids into poverty just to avoid paying support for his eldest son.

    As for the child that died and that they buried their baby at their property. I have seen Nicole mention this somewhere along the line, in early 2015, but how much is true and how much is conjecture is hard to say.

    Are you happy now? The comments are all about you Nicole.


  6. To Nicole, everything is about Nicole. Producing an awful lot of offspring is the only thing she has ever done with any success. Her present ideology (could change tomorrow morning) means that popping out a bunch of kids with a lazy deadbeat is a glorious accomplishment that is greater than any other thing. Eye roll. She doesn’t realize that most people who have ever interacted with her accurately see a very stupid woman who’s life is an escalating litany of idiotic choices that she is determined to make her children share. Most folks look at her and see a nutcase who is essentially homeless. “But I have a home!!” Sort of, at least until the shed rots and collapses on itself.


  7. This bears repeating:
    “But she has 12 kids. Their first born is Alex and she took on the role of Mom to him. Sadly, they threw him under the bus on social media because he dared to speak up about the abuse he endured by the hands of nicole and Joe. His parents who should have protected him. To top it off, Joe refused to pay child support that he still owes and to this day refuses to work to avoid deductions from his pay. He would rather plunges the 11 other kids into poverty just to avoid paying support for his eldest son.”

    But you know, she looks down upon other women whose children’s fathers are not involved. I believe the term she uses is “baby daddies” and that is not meant to disparage the ‘fathers’.


  8. I have four kids. I worked til 4:30 pm at my job, went to a “pamper party” for me, then gave birth to my first child (a daughter) at 4:36 am after a few hours of labor.
    Less than a year & a half later, had my twins just over a month before their due date. (It’s common for twins to be born early)
    They were both heads down & delivered (naturally) after a few hours of labor. Both weighed 5 lbs. 1 oz.
    My last son was 10 lbs. 4 oz. ,natural birth. 5-6 hours of labor.
    Then, we decided my husband would have a vasectomy.
    Am I against pain relief? 100% no! Bring on the pain stuff, I say!
    Why didn’t I receive any? No one said anything & I was already in labor, the babies were born quickly & didn’t think of asking.
    By the way, not one doctor said a thing about having a cesarean.


  9. Having 11 kids doesn’t make you an accomplished mother though. She managed to have 11 but she has failed at mothering them

    Anyway Sally my 17 year old daughter said to tell you that your cow is cute and wanted to know if she is more of a pet or a working animal. The kids and I have a field trip to the dairy farm this month. My daughter is a huge animal lover and has always been fascinated with cows. I have not. When I was little we lived in a rental home in the middle of a cow pasture and there was this mean little calf who used to chase me and try to head but me. That gave me a slight fear and somewhat negative opinion on cows. I will have the kids doing a unit on cows and dairies before our trip . Do you have any advice or suggestions about anything you think we should focus on? Great blog! Unlike Nicole I really love the blogs where she is not the total focus! I always learn something new .


  10. Perhaps Nicole has to validate herself by popping out baby after baby because of Joe having a child with his side woman, while Nicole had miscarriage after miscarriage. Faced with Joe’s love child and her inability to carry a baby to term she may have blamed herself for not being woman enough, or maybe even Joe blamed her, as a deflection from his being a man whore. Overwhelmed with grief and jealousy she may have somehow gotten it into her head that her self worth is tied up with how many babies she can have. She does seem baby obsessed if her publishing of baby pictures and videos are indicative of her thought process. Otherwise, for someone who is so invested in #largefamilylife she spends most of her children’s waking hours away from them at work, shopping or immersed in her online fantasy world. Then again someone in that family has to work and we all know Joe “Do you work? Fuck no” isn’t going to do it.


  11. I love that you compared Nicole to a cow.? But, I can’t believe you compared Frances to Nicole. Poor Frances! I’m sure she accomplishes more in a day than Nicole does when she’s at home. ?


  12. Childbirth is just the beginning of being a parent. It’s the next 18-odd years that determine if you’re a success or not. Although biologically speaking, an individual is not a genetic success until there are GRANDGET.

    As for child rearing, well, the years may fly by but some of the days are ENDLESS.


  13. I might get some knucklehead thumps, since I did not actually birth my children. Birthing is the easiest part in becoming a parent. It’s the 18 years afterwards, that are the work of parenting. A birther and a parent can be two different things. Not all birthers are parents. As Frances the cow demonstrates. lol.

    I agree, birthing is not an accomplishment per se. It’s a natural process, people do it. Mega birthing, maybe that is some accomplishment, I dunno. Female dogs in puppy mills birth litters, almost non stop, until they are useless to the breeder. I doubt the dog feels terribly accomplished.


  14. Whoop de do nicole, good for you for thinking a womens privates are a clown car. Cant afford them dont have them. Cant pay attention to each one? DONT HAVE THEM!!!!!!


  15. wanted to know if she is more of a pet or a working animal.

    She is a working girl. Dairy cows are too expensive to feed to keep one as a pet.

    That said, we sort of have an “arrangement” with her. I suspect, barring unforeseen complications, that she will live out her natural life here on this little farm and go into retirement here. That is rare for a dairy cow. They usually become McDonald’s burgers.


  16. Birthing is the easiest part in becoming a parent. It’s the 18 years afterwards, that are the work of parenting.

    Absolutely. Yes.


  17. Thank you for this! In total agreement that plopping out offspring is not an accomplishment. It’s bullshit thinking that the measure of a woman is how many babies she can have. And about breastfeeding. Some women can’t, for whatever reason. They should never be made to feel like a failure for that. And to whoever said that raising the children is the accomplishment; yes! Exactly! And Kentucky Bred, I’m certain you’re more of a mother to your kids than Nicole could ever hope to be.


  18. @ magenta, yes, she does put down baby daddies. She also puts down unwed mothers but she had six babies with Joe before they got married. Personally I could care less if a woman is wed or not when she chooses to have a child. Nicole is such a hypocrite which is one reason I can’t stand her!


  19. Even a stray dog can give birth and nurse her puppies. Giving birth and making milk are not accomplishments. I agree 100%. That’s just basic biology.
    This seems to be how women who have zero actual accomplishments justify themselves in their own heads.
    Running a successful business for more than 3 years is an accomplishment. Having your home schooled kids get into colleges is an accomplishment. I hope she can add those to her list one day.


  20. So I have two biological children, two step children and one adopted from foster care teenager
    Does that make me accomplished? No
    It makes me have a lot of responsibilities
    Handling those responsibilities with dignity and patience and education and a mothering instinct – that is the accomplishment
    The fact that I work full time and they are provided for on every level – that is an accomplishment
    Fuck Nicole and her bullshit
    She has no clue what it takes to be a mommy


  21. Hey, remember the Jerry Lewis marathon? People would donate when they saw something they enjoyed? Nicole is hosting a never ending version of the Jerry Lewis marathon. Need money? Post a cute pic. Need A LOT? Post a video of your baby. She’s shameless.


  22. You are a parent if you do everything in your power to keep your kids safe. That video of the baby standing by a table sent shudders down my spine. Power strips haphazardly hanging from a shelf, empty outlets not covered, cords everywhere. Just an accident waiting to happen. She said he doesn’t spend much time in the pack-n-play, but I would call & raise on that one.
    One more thing, I’ve been going to the same lady for my hair for years & she’s cut all my boy’s hair as well. When my boys were toddlers, she wouldn’t let them get on the floor when their haircuts were done. She told me how hair can embed itself in your skin & cause a major issue. And she’s been doing hair for over 20 years.


  23. I read the entries on that old blog with increasing sadness and astonishment…Nicole sounds sane. She sounds like she cares about her children’s wellbeing, not this “oh, they love dirt and no heat or shower or toilet or walls!” They’re all happy to have an oven! They look warm and cozy – look at the clothes all hanging there in the closet. Look at the smiles on the children’s faces. I gather from people who have known them for years that they’ve been “off” for a long time, probably from the beginning, but there’s a progression here that is truly frightening.

    I think Joe has always been a worthless ass, Nicole has always been too devoted to him, and I think all the poverty and pregnancy hormones have wreaked havoc on her sanity and turned her into this incredibly hard, mean woman. She HAS to insist everything is just wonderful and just the way they want it or she could not function at all (and unlike Joe, she does function, she holds a job, does more for the children than he does, even is the active grifter which is “work” more than sitting around eating and smoking joints is). I just feel sorry for her now. I’m not excusing or condoning her actions or her neglect but just…Nicole, there is help out there for you. You and your children had better and can have better again.


  24. LOL I was with you right up to “I just feel sorry for her now.”

    I just can’t conjure up pity for that woman.


  25. Rose, I was also right there with you up to the feeling sorry for Nicole. She is an adult. She was quite able to not have more children than she could provide for at anytime. She could have demanded that Joe do his duty or leave him but she did not. She choose to stretch the family to the breaking point. When you see how they lived in the past and the squalor they subsist in now their breaking point was when they moved onto the to The Blessed Homestead. The Nauglers have been going downhill at an alarming rate. They were much better off when they had support from the LDS church but because Joey was not willing to work to provide for his family that support ended. The good folks of the church did their level best to help them but they were unwilling to help themselves. You can’t support lazy and stupid indefinitely. Nicole, maybe it is time you stop supporting your lazy stupid husband as well.


  26. I feel sorry for the Naugler children, but I do not feel sorry for either parent. Both parents have failed their children miserably and there is no excuse. #1 Rule of Parenting: Don’t continue to have children when you can’t afford to house, clothe and feed the ones you already have. (Well, maybe that’s not #1 or there could be several vying for the top slot, but that’s right up there.)

    If only one person has agreed to go out and earn some money to support the household (which is fine, some couples are still able to have a single income-earner), then that income is how you frame your budget.
    For example, I was a single parent from the get-go. I had a full time job which paid a fairly decent income for a single person. However, that wasn’t quite enough when I added a baby to the mix – a baby that needed daycare when I returned to work, at an average of $700/month. Luckily, I was able to start my own small business, working from my home, and provide the income necessary to cover: rent, infant child care, medical insurance, car insurance, clothing, food, electricity, telephone, and every other incident life expense. Not easy, but I did it. A well-meaning friend said to me early on: “You need to have another child so your son won’t be an only child.” I just looked at them in amazement. No way could I afford a second child – I was barely keeping things together with one! So I didn’t have any more children, even though I loved being a mother and love my son more than anyone or anything on the planet. I was raised that one should live within one’s means, and that you sacrifice so your children can have the best you can provide for them.
    This is why I have no pity (nor respect) for the Naugler parents. I am not sure they could ever have truly afforded more than several children, since it seems that Joe was never able to hold down a job for long. They skated by for years because their Mormon ward provided them with housing, and probably also provided them with some food assistance and other assistance as well. They never could afford the children they kept popping out.
    As to being accomplished: As you said Sally – an accomplishment is something one has to work for, not something that will happen naturally, such as “have sex with my spouse without any birth control and get pregnant.” Where’s the effort? Where’s the sacrifice, the hard work, the grit and determination? The only ones I see sacrificing, working hard, and trying are the older children. Nicole does work, does bring in an income – so I give her credit for that. But she should have stopped having kids a long time ago, instead of increasing the financial strain on their extremely limited means. I also think she should have dumped her worthless husband long ago. I don’t believe he does a thing around that shack. She’s always claiming he does things, like “fix the rice,” or teach the children, or build things around their dump – but I notice there are never any pictures of him doing a darn thing. Plenty of cute vids of the baby, and the next two youngest ones, a few pictures here and there of the oldest boys working in the garden or building things, but not a dang picture of her own husband doing one useful thing. I don’t count feeding his face on “court days” as work.


  27. Oh, I wouldn’t expect you to! I am thousands of miles away and have not been the focus of her venom and lies. If I were in your shoes I doubt I could muster much pity at all. I have none for a bad neighbor I dealt with in the past. If hell opened up and swallowed him I’d smile and go about my day.


  28. They have been going downhill for a while now. The slope is just steeper now and they’re moving downhill faster. That blog entry is sometime after that family had been in Elizabethtown and after they had moved to and then away from Glasgow Kentucky. They have no interest in working for anything better. They’ll take whatever gift you give them and liquidate it into cash if possible but they won’t work. They will wallow in that dump indefinitely because it is the course of least resistance and because they can’t leave to fresh pastures and wallets.


  29. Joe is a kept man, with a roving eye.
    To “accomplish” keeping him, Nicole had one baby after another, surrounding Joe with his offspring and sexual favors.
    She has made his life easier by not expecting him to work and support the family. Nicole keeps Joe close and under her scrutiny. She has made up the fantasy that he is the guardian of his children on their “homestead”.
    She nearly lost him to another woman years ago, in a relationship that resulted in a baby by another woman. I’m sure she still thinks about that.
    As a teenager and young woman, I’m betting she saw, and still sees him as a dashing, slightly dangerous freethinking rebel. Nicole has worked hard to mirror his “worldly” views to keep him happy, and avoid marital, political arguments.
    It took six viable babies for him to finally marry her. (An “accomplishment”)
    That was a lot of work, proving that she was a ” real woman” who could keep her man entertained and produce his progeny one after another.
    I’m sure his ogling Al’s daughter threatened the hell out of her, and reminded her that he is still not totally devoted to her.
    By manipulating to keep him at home, fatted up and happy with weed, she keeps other women’s eyes off him.
    She probably fears Joe being buff (?), accomplished at homesteading and working at a job, out of her sight.
    She won him from another woman, and she’s going to keep it that way.
    Her life, and the relevance of her children, depend on Joe being there.
    That relevance is another reason to keep all the children around.
    I recall she admits falling apart when Joe went to prison. She did not buck up for her children, but ended up staying in one room of a house, that was reportedly very dirty.
    Joe might not stay with an empty nest and a wife who can no longer produce, is older, and falling apart because of the hard life she has led to keep her “lover”…
    I suspect if Joe took off Nicole would not see her children as a reason continue leading the same lifestyle.
    All in my opinion…


  30. No pity here, either. Pity is sorrow and compassion caused by the suffering and misfortune of others. I liken her misfortunes to poor choices. She is obviously of intelligence, so she has the capacity to understand poor choices.

    I’ve heard her in one of her videos she posted, bragging that at least she can keep her man. Yeah, now that’s a accomplishment. Who gets the gold star, Nicole or Joe?



  31. Maybe slightly off topic, but . . . I started to read the blog post posted by the Blessed One yesterday. “No Doctors, No Drugs, Lots of Critics”. It is from 2011, and was posted why? I’m guessing it was in response to the last couple of posts here. I stopped at the second paragraph, wherein she says the following: “Self-reliance is important to us and self-reliance begins with education.” “Education is important.” “Ignorance makes you helpless.”

    WTF? Self-reliance on what? GFM monies, the PayPal button, and electricity at her shop so she can attempt to cook? Education? For who? Certainly not for her children. I disagree with their lifestyle for many reasons, but the denial of an education, A N Y education, to their children is the biggest one. And yes, the Nauglers are making the choice to live in squalor. Not the children. The parents. The parents who made the choice to have more children than they could afford, and their children are paying the price.

    And, FWIW, if giving birth 11 times is your sole accomplishment, God help you.


  32. “Education is important.”

    From the woman who 1) doesn’t educate her own kids, 2) won’t let anyone else educate them, and 3) reads Alex Jones and believes his shit.


  33. @MIM, In my opinion you’ve given the best explanation of the Naugler parents’ relationship I’ve seen yet, especially given Nicole’s recent disclosures regarding her lack of family connections. She’s only got one person to bear her up other than the other little people she’s made who have no choice in the matter. She must keep him at all costs or the illusion will be destroyed.

    Everything else stems from the fantasy you describe, IMO.


  34. Kaylee, I am so so sorry about your friend. That is awful 🙁

    Thank you everyone for your perspective. I think I am applying too much of my own life to the situation (mother absolutely destroyed and kept down in the dirt by worthless abusive father) when the circumstances and people involved are very different.


  35. I know this is off topic but, I do like the old picture of Nicole when she had all her teeth. Do you think hygiene is an important “thing” for Nicole to teach her kids? If you don’t take care of your own teeth, how do you take care of your 11 kid’s dental hygiene? I also noticed in the OK Go video she posted, her daughter didn’t have glasses on and now she wears glasses. How long did it take Nicky to realize her daughter needed glasses? She obviously doesn’t take any of the kids to get regular check-ups. She is so lucky that these kids have not had any serious medical needs.
    When I was pregnant with my son, around 28 weeks, I started spotting. I ended up on bed rest in the hospital, for one month, because I had Placenta previa. My OB didn’t catch it, during all my prenatal check ups. My son was born 2 months premature. He was in the NICU for one month before he was able to come home. He was hooked up to monitors to make sure he didn’t stop breathing once he came home. It was one of the most difficult times I had to go through. I am so thankful we had access to healthcare. Emergencies happen, it doesn’t matter how much you educate yourself using Google and WebMD. I’m sure if I were a crunchy mom, with a plan to have my baby at home, my baby would have died. The baby was never in distress, I just had some bleeding. If I would have left it up to “God,” my son would not be here today. He was born 5 lbs. 1 oz, 20 in. at 32 weeks. He is now 6 years old and off the charts for height and weight, his daddy is 6’5″. I vaccinate my kids and take them to the doctor for routine checkup and take them to the dentist, every 6 months. I really hope that Nicky can at least take them to the dentist since dental hygiene is not important to her.
    I know I did a lot of rambling. I just hope when Nicole reads this she realizes how selfish she is being. Most of all, I hope she realizes how fortunate she has been that she has not had any complications with her home births. I hope she isn’t planning on having any more kids. She doesn’t have room in that shed for the kids she does have.


  36. If you don’t take care of your own teeth,

    It may not be a case of “not taking care” of her teeth. Eleven+ pregnancies will rob a woman of a great deal of dental calcium. Add to that the possibility that she simply was born with less than delightful teeth in the first place, and here we are. And dental care of the sort I think she needs is very, very expensive.

    My sister and I share two parents’ genes, and yet I have every tooth I started out with more than six decades ago, with the exception of my wisdom teeth and one other that cracked too badly to be repaired and was pulled and replaced with a dental implant several years ago. My sister had ongoing dental troubles throughout her life. It wasn’t because she “didn’t take care” of her teeth. She just got the bad roll of the dice.

    Dental care is something where I sort of empathize with Nicole. There’s no money for it, not even for what it would take to make appointments at the dental school (assuming she could get in ) and then closing the shop long enough to meet them.


  37. You know, I wondered why J didn’t work. I assumed he was just too lazy to work because based on the condition of their property, home, children he is in charge of, and their vehicle, he doesn’t seem to be too motivated. But, Kaylee makes a good point about the past due child support. Whether he is a loafer because of his lack of motivation or because he is avoiding paying child support or both, we get the idea of the kind of character that went into making him a shining example of a human slug.
    When I was married to the sperm donor (that’s all he ever contributed to my children), he figured out very quickly that I would support our two kids so he went from one job to another and by the time, drinking himself stupid in between. Soon after my son’s birth (less than 6 weeks old and daughter 15 months), I left him. Of course, in court, he told the judge he didn’t like the idea of paying me child support because how did he know that I wouldn’t spend it on myself. The judge tore him a new one and ordered him to pay or go to jail. That day in court, he paid 800 bucks in a few months back support with the help of his new worker bee. But, he soon quit working at a job that withheld taxes and started driving a truck for a man who paid him cash so for years and years he didn’t pay a dime….but Karma…you know, has a way of jumping up and biting the ass of the offender and after my son graduated high school, out of the blue, I began getting back child support. Sperm donor who hadn’t spoken to my children ever called and asked my son how old he was to which my son said 18 and Sperm Donor said, then why am I paying child support to which my son said, you owe mom…A few months later, apparently he served some time in jail, he called my daughter and she said, BTW, mom wanted me to tell you that Kenny (my old fart) really likes the boots she bought him with that back child support. Oh my was his bad Karma sweet to me. For 15 years, regular as clock work, that man paid me 550 bucks a month until he paid me back the money he had deprived me of those years I had to work so many damn jobs to take care of my kids. I hope that J gets bit by Karma as well…I hope that whoever raised his son is able to get the money due him or her and I hope every time J raises his ugly head, child support is there to stick his butt in jail….True that.

    That entire gofundme thing is still kind of crazy to me. I have FB friends who start GFM accounts to move from one place to another and N’s GFM bothered the hell out of me. Instead of cleaning her shit up and getting her act together, she begs for money and opens a business…hell…she cannot take care of her animals on her shit pile but she is going to clean other folks’ dogs? My grandmother used to say that you can tell the character of people by the way they treat their animals. Leaving dogs, cats, goats, chickens, and who knows what else alone on a farm while they go live in a hotel was beyond cruel.


  38. MIM
    I think your hypothesis is pretty interesting too. It also works with HER wanting him to quit his job rather than shave. (Was that job at Hardee’s? Wow, that was a major loss for them if so). I would however change one thing:
    “By manipulating to keep him at home, fatted up and happy with weed, ” …she keeps HIM from eyeing other women. Hard to imagine it the other way around.
    The article ToothandNail linked from the last blog entry also sought to answer the question as to why people stick with bad decisions and even rigorously defend them, even when provided solid opposing evidence. The study showed that the more heavily invested one is in a decision, (#11kidsandlivininginashack withawortlessmanchild) the more stubbornly one will deny reality, using any number of defense mechanisms. This would seem to apply so often as to why Nicole so rigorously defends so many bad decisions. Then by completely blocking all outside feedback and dissenting family, she keeps the dissonance minimized and perpetuates her fantasies. The youthful pic probably helps her fantasy escape from the “after” picture of the two of them now.

    Her #mybodyrocks-cringe worthy and laughable. I bet she tells tubbyhubby this often. #francishasabetterbodythannicole.anyday.


  39. Okay Sally. I understand your point. But, this kind of goes along with what everyone else is saying, she can’t afford to take care of herself let alone 11 children and one deadbeat husband IMO.


  40. Comparing the “Queen of Shitanistan ” to a cow is beyond creative writing.
    Damn Sally you own it…LMAO @ another good blog. 🙂


  41. Nicole may also have dry mouth syndrome which can be hell on your mouth. Biotene mouthwash (the toothpaste is now useless), the formulation with enzymes that mimics those find in saliva may help. PBF. The PBF ORAL RINSE (plaque biofilm) product contains the enzymes mutanase, dextranase, lysozyme, lactoperoxidase, and glucose oxidase.

    It’s about $6 a bottle here. If she keeps her eyes open she can find it for less elsewhere.


  42. Plus, it’s really hard to practice oral hygiene when the nearest shit pile is walk uphill….that wasn’t nice but without running water for baths or showers or just to wash the face, I’d think the last think she would think about is her teeth. One of my sisters was given an antibiotic as a baby that discolored her teeth and it even caused her permanent teeth to look dark like they were dead. When she was teenager, she finally begged to get her teeth pulled because by then they had started hurting her. She wore dentures from like 14 on. The rest of us have had good teeth and I we all have our original teeth except for my two front teeth that were knocked out in a car accident and I now sport a plate…the same wreck broke my nose and eye orbit…sucked big time but they fixed the nose and the eye orbit. I hope she takes the kids to the dentist but I sort of doubt it…if she won’t take a kid to the ER for a burn, I doubt teeth cleaning is out of the question.


  43. N is posting pictures of her lone hen and the chicks that hatched under the most primitive conditions. Bless her heart.


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