About

romancing

It actually starts here.

You’re welcome to trot over there and read, but you very likely will find yourself confused in short order.  That website (and embedded blog) is focused on a very narrow subject and has a very limited audience: alumni and former students of Bob Jones University, Greenville, South Carolina.

It’s my website and blog.  My name is Sally Davis.

And now that you know this, Joe and Nicole, exactly what do you think you’ve gained?

I am a former student of Bob Jones Academy, the high school associated with BJU. I was there in the mid-sixties, which is a very long time ago (fifty years).

Shortly after joining Facebook, a friend of mine who knew my history sent me a link to a Facebook forum called “Bob Jones University Survivors,” the title being tongue-in-cheek and similar to t-shirts that read “I traveled the Alaska Highway and survived.”  It was supposed to be a community for former students and grads. The word “survivor” had nothing to do with any sort of abuse.

Bob Jones is a very strict fundamentalist Christian college, with a pretty unique culture, almost incomprehensible to the uninitiated.

At any rate, I joined the group and then posted a bit and discovered this community of people who understood the world where I was raised.  Some of them remain enmeshed in the religion. Others, like me, have fled.  We still get all the jokes, though.

However, as is common in social media, there were some bad apples in the barrel.  Three women in particular had become mega-bullies and over the course of several years, the whole damn thing fell apart.  By then, I’d made some pretty good friends among those who participated.

The bullying made the Naugler saga look like child’s play.  It involved the usual doxxing, and fake identities, and all the typical fake Facebook pages and identities, but so much of it was so cruel it’s hard for me to even describe.  The victims of these bullies have families, and they went after the families.  They went after children, spouses, siblings. A great deal of it was occurring not in the virtual world of Facebook, but in real life.

And the pages started, one after another.  Facebook would take them down, and they’d pop back up.  Everyone was trading insults.  It was the sort of childish stuff we’ve come to see with “Charles Smyth” and Donny Cook and “Jack Schitt” and all the other characters in Nauglerland.  And it was relentless.

One day, a friend of mine called me pretty much in hysterics. She was crying so hard that it took several minutes for her to compose herself enough so that I could understand her.  She ran one of the pages.  And they were coming after her with everything in their collective, considerable power. She had family they could really hurt.  Relationships that would be irreparably damaged.  She told me she was going to shut the page down and leave Facebook.

I asked her to give me one hour.  She finally agreed.

And an hour later, Romancing the Victims was online.  It was bare, bare bones at that point, and only had two pages, but it was up.  Her page was scrubbed clean and the only message on it was a link to Romancing.  Within two weeks, she removed the whole page and only Romancing was left.

My idea was (and still is) that if you can get stuff off Facebook, you can eliminate much of the silly sandbox fighting. I decided to simply document the crap these three women were pulling.  Yes, I do add my sometimes snarky commentary, but most of the website consists of screen shots showing examples of what they’ve done, and how they’ve done it.

The goal was to warn the innocent, to try to limit the body count.  I’ve said from the beginning that if somebody doesn’t believe me, that’s fine. I cannot help them.  However, a lot of people do understand, and I get regular and frequent notes thanking me for the information I have provided. There is no question that the influence of these three women has been significantly reduced.  One, in particular, has gone nearly silent, and as a result, I rarely even mention her any more.

And that’s the briefest summary I can give for Romancing that would be intelligible to people who have no idea what it’s all about.

headline daily beast

So, I was happily doing the Romancing site, when one day last May, I saw a link to an article about a Kentucky couple whose children had been removed from the home because they “homeschooled.”

I was interested because  they were in Kentucky, and  because at first I thought they were probably fundigelical Christians and likely came from my world. I soon discovered the second assumption was very wrong, but by then, I was hooked on the story.  It was fascinating.

Those of you bothering to read this know it’s very like a train wreck.  Once you realize what’s happening, it’s hard to look away.

Over the next few weeks, I discovered many of the various pro-Naugler and anti-Naugler pages and observed all the mud-slinging that was developing, and recognized the syndrome.  It was the same stuff, just a different subject and a different group of people.

I commented only a few times, but mostly, I just watched.

One day, Nicole posted a silly little video about a raccoon and it just irritated the shit out of me.  She presents herself as this “homesteader” and yet thought that raccoon was so cute.  She obviously never saw what a raccoon does to homestead chickens.  So I commented with a photo of one of our hens who had been mortally wounded by a raccoon, and said that I hated them and would kill any of them we saw.

Within minutes, Joe came over to my very public Facebook page snooping around.   He “followed” me, and then began commenting on stuff with the intention of starting an argument.

Joe follow

I’m including a couple of snippets from that conversation here, but I’m also going to post the whole thing on another page because it’s important to this history.

threat

Note:  Remember, I had commented very, very little up to this point.  And what comments I did make were not generalized but specifically in answer to comments that Joe himself had made.  In other words, I was not talking about the Naugler family.  I was talking to Joe Naugler.

asking for it

No, he didn’t create a page/group/whatever to intimidate or stalk me.  He just came right over to my Facebook page and did the intimidating right there in the open.

And that exchange was a game changer.  I didn’t like the man at all. Not one little bit.

However, not too long after that, I had the following exchange. It was a thread that resulted from Nicole posting a photo of some stuff she had canned, and the admin of the The Real Truth grabbing it and posting it.

TRTAN

I almost never commented, but couldn’t help myself this time, because it simply wasn’t fair.

There is so much stuff to be critical of regarding the Naugler parents that making stuff up isn’t necessary.  So I defended Nicole.

And I immediately got the axe.  Right after my comments above, I was banned and everything I’d said removed.  The reason given to me later was that the admin felt that all the critics should band together and present a united front, or some such bullshit.  I decline to walk in lockstep with anyone.

Truth is truth, whether it is expressed by me, or by Nicole, or by the admin of one of these pages, or by Joe Naugler.

So, there I was. Banned by the critics and threatened with lawsuits by Joe. What was I supposed to do?

I started a blog.

2 thoughts on “About”

  1. You;re kind of sick that you spend so much of your life, including creating and maintaining this blog to harass a family. You should get some help for that. Maybe get a hobby or something to give your life meaning.

  2. You;re kind of sick that you spend so much of your life, including creating and maintaining this blog to harass a family. You should get some help for that. Maybe get a hobby or something to give your life meaning.

    Doesn’t it say something about you that you are reading this and taking time to comment? Define “harass,” please. I simply disagree with Nicole and Joe. It’s not about a “family.” She makes it about a “family.”

    I have several hobbies. I am retired. My life has lots of meaning.

    Stick around and read awhile. You might be surprised.

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